I am a day behind already and it's only Tuesday! Happy Full Moon in Gemini! Today I wanted to write about not only the last week but also about Reflection and Procrastination - ADHD diagnosis and how that changed my course.
Since last Monday's post - a lot has happened. Remember how I said that I wanted to move away from laser cutting? Seems as though every time I try- it ramps up. I have had the most random encounters and enquiries, even without advertising. I've decided to leave it as is, not turn anyone away, keep it down low, and see what flows towards me.
I have also decided to postpone the workshops until the new year. Between content creation, marketing, social media management and studying - this feels like the right thing to do. This will also give me more time to work on The Barn and organise everything I already have.
Over the weekend, I mapped out the layout and wrote my shopping and DIY lists. My dad (Pape Pete) and I will build most of the storage and workbenches. We have so much material and supplies, so I expect some enjoyable projects to pop up!
My kids were at their Dad's over the weekend, which gave me a lot of space to reflect, purge and contemplate on what has been vs where I am now.
A few short months ago, a very close friend and I cut ties. He was a very prominent person for me over the last three years. We had experienced and been through a lot together, and he is still a very significant part of where I am today, even if we are no longer in physical contact.
Procrastination has always been a debilitating part of my reality. In 2021, my friend and I found out within weeks of one another that we both had undiagnosed ADHD. It was a massive relief for both of us; having someone there who understood to share thoughts and revelations with was a lifesaver. Once I was diagnosed, my inner-being and how I have functioned and fluctuated over the years finally made sense. The more I discovered and understood, the more I could navigate how I work and why I am continuously jumping from one thing to the other.
Fast forward two years, deep soul searching, deep shadow work, and deep inner-child work, my outlook on my everyday life and how I work through it has significantly changed. I can quickly move away from procrastination now and recognise when I am biding in a lull - which generally means I need some form of rest or self-care. Some weeks are harder than others - last week is a perfect example. However, procrastinating generally happens at night now. It helps that I am now working towards and studying a subject that I am in love with, revealing new insights and artistic trajectories during the day. Night has become a let-go zone - whereas before, I was avoiding working during the day and instead, working at night. This happened for years and was hard to break away from.
Another aspect of procrastination was held a lot within my Feminine and Masculine energetic blueprint. My friend assisted me (not that he is aware) in navigating this particular aspect. The way his brain worked and stored information was always highly fascinating to me, I was constantly inspired by him. Once we stopped talking, I chose to dive into what inspired me the most about how the mechanicals of his mind worked and utilise that in the way I work and communicate. In doing this, I was able to see where my strengths were regarding the energetic frequency I needed to tap into for different parts of my day. It has been a game-changer. I also created a workshop based around this and how others can channel the energetic flow state their blueprint calls upon to submit to and complete different tasks.
Contemplating the last few years and what I have been through to where I am now - time seems so unreal to me. There were so many moments that felt like I was never going to get ahead like I was never going to 'figure it out' and that I would be stuck in repeating patterns and cycles for eternity. My spiritual journey was so healing in so many different ways. That friendship was so unexpected and so healing in so many different ways - it's nice to be able to enjoy and not have any expectations on 'figuring it out' anymore and appreciate where I am, who I have met, what I have discovered and what/who will come my way.
I am a firm believer in 'What is meant for you won't pass you by'. Being present and acknowledging all that I have been through has been the greatest gift of all. Being able to share that with others - makes my Inner Child squeal with excitement!
Happy Full Moon in Gemini my loves x Leesh
